Monday, July 21, 2008

Where Have Your Feet Been?

Did you know that elephants don’t leave footprints? Don’t quote me on this, I heard it first person from an elephant this morning so I can’t vouch for it’s veracity. It got me thinking though. A three ton animal takes a step and nothing. Wow.

I began to think about my footprints; those I make and those that have been made upon me.

If I could ask God one question (this week) it would be: why do we remember the things that we do? What causes one moment to stand up out of years and be a totem of a summer, a person, a lifetime?

My grandmother is selling her home on Martha’s Vineyard. I’ve only been there 5 or so times my whole life I don’t remember any of the more recent visits. I remember the ones when I was little: A cut on the blackberry bushes, the rope swing, having tea at Mrs. Jackie’s house. Well, I remember her cat anyway. And her sofa.

What’s the formula for that magic moment when a person’s foot sinks in?

For Tara it was a trip to the mall. With Ryan it was the day that we quietly, unknowingly outsmarted the entire Spanish class. Others even more recently, I couldn’t tell you.

What makes one foot print deeper than others?

I have a friend who I love very dearly who was never supposed to be my friend. Now I know this sounds weird, but he was my brother’s friend when we were kids, then my friend’s brother when we were older and later on he was another friend’s boyfriend. During none of this time did we spend any great amount of time together developing our relationship. Bradley and my brother aren’t close anymore, neither are the girls and I but somehow he and I are and will always be friends. I have other friends whose siblings I have spent more hours with, had more fun with, but none whose company I was gladder of.

What do my foot prints look like?

I know that when I leave my footprints will be left deeply in certain places. Mz. Lee is still in the denial stage of her grief. Rachel Wilkinson and I will ever be inseparable in spirit when given the opportunity. I don’t doubt that I have friends. But I do wonder if they have served any purpose other than shifting earth. Have I been the step that pushed a seed into the ground so that it might take root? Have I crushed a bug that later might have bitten someone? Have I created a puddle that a thirsty frog might drink? Or just made mudpies?

Maybe that will be my question for God next week.

1 comment:

Heather said...

You have left footprints on my heart in ways that you can never imagine. Though there are thousands of moments, one of my favorites is the ridiculous discussion about the death penalty at Bardot and the acknowledgment that its really just about the show...